Follow-up to Good Girl

       I've been reading Do Hard Things by Alex and Brett Harris. Well, reading is a bit of a loose term. I got half-way through it on our road trip in January because Iowa was so boring, and haven't touched it until today. This morning, I read a section called "Be Known for What You Do (more than for what you don't)
       Let's take a look at what I said in "Good Girl":

         Technically speaking, I'm a "good girl." Homeschooled, Christian...who doesn't consider "dating" to be          something that should happen unless both parties involved are thinking of marriage. I stay out of trouble          (sometimes), I don't loiter, and I try to obey my parents.

      In essence, what I said was this: I don't do all these things, and that makes me a good girl.  But today, I read this in Do Hard Things: "Being considered a good teen only requires that we don't do bad stuff like taking drugs, drinking, and partying."
      Wow. Talk about a jolt. What the Harris's just told me is absolutely true, that teens are often considered "good enough" or even "exceptional" if they don't do bad stuff. I don't do drugs, and somehow that makes me a "good teen?" What the heck! I was falling victim to a ridiculously low standard without even knowing it.
       I have a confession to make. This year, I've been able to get straight A's (except in math, but math is evil) in all my college courses. This morning, I got a message from the Dean of Admissions at Concordia St Paul saying that I was eligable for some program that puts me on some list that makes me automatically considered for an academic scholarship. Yes, that made me feel proud. But when you compare the amount of effort it took for me to earn a place in that program, suddenly I don't feel so good about myself.
      Getting A's is not hard. At all. I can get A's in my classes with minimal effort and some serious procrastinating. That's what I've been doing this year. And somehow, I managed to get on the "Go Farther" program at age sixteen?
       It is SICK how little effort it took for me to reach this point. I'm not being pushed. I float through college courses, get good grades, and am being rewarded for minimal effort? I'll say it again: What the heck! The worst part is: this is nobody's fault but my own. Look, people. Being above average isn't something to be proud of because the average is so low.
       I consider myself to be an adolescent. By saying that word, I conform to society's expectations for my life. I've even used the "I'm just a kid" and "I'm growing up" argument as an excuse.
      Yikes.
      What I'm trying to say is this: I made a mistake. My mindset is still stuck in a rut, thinking that my age is an excuse to not make the hard decision. I need to push myself, and to hell with the "Go Farther" program.