Follow-up To A Moment of Love

I wanted to add to yesterday's post, something crucial that cannot afford to be overlooked: It is not always us being "beset" by evil--sometimes we are to blame. Sometimes we act in ways that have no justification. This is crucial to understand--you cannot fix a problem until you admit you have one. Over and over in the bible, God makes it clear that humans sin of their own accord.
Perhaps something that is even more important to understand is this. Ephesians 2:8-9 says, "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not of your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast."

"it is the gift of God, not a result of works." Boy, is this one a ego-crusher and bubble-burster. I know many people who would reject this completely. It has a tendency to deflate any pride I might have, which I count as a good thing. But it has taken me a long, long time to understand and fully come to embrace this. It increases my awe of God, for it says this: I loved you so much that I am giving you this gift of salvation even though you deserve punishment. God's love awes me. "And this is not of your own doing, it is the gift of God." A moment of Love.

A moment of love

Today is being...interesting. I woke up with all these good intentions, and now I find myself, after snapping at my mother and mentally tearing myself down as a result, writing this post when I should be doing something constructive. For that reason, I'll keep this one short.
     Mainly, all I find myself thinking, "What is wrong with me??" Why can't I act in a way that would build people up and not bring them down? Why can't I remember God? Well, I know the answer. I just don't particularly care for it. For some reason, I do not feel like praying. Algebra, emails to colleges, and thank-you cards are not the highlights of my day. In fact, I seem to be finding every excuse possible to not accomplish what I need to. What is wrong with me?
      1st Thessalonians 5:16-22 says, "Rejoice always; Pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Jesus Christ. Do not quench the spirit; do not despise prophetic utterances. But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good; abstain from every form of evil."
      As I'm writing this, I think I realize that we, everybody, need to hold fast to everything that is good--cling to it with every fiber of our strength, because if we do not we are beset with evil. Whether it be anger, a bad attitude in my case, discouragement, or hate, many things. God, help me now to cling to all that is good, to cling to You. Please forgive me, God, for my pessimism, my anger, my hate. Forgive me.
      I forgive you. My love, little one. 

Story Blurb

      The sword flashed behind me and I ducked, yelping as it changed directions and hit my shin. I ducked again as it swung around and this time, retaliated. The metallic, sharp sounds filled the clearing. Akira laughed as I turned a clumsy, but effective, summersault and swung at her from behind. “My old fencing teacher thought that grace is as much a part of swordplay as the swords are! I don't believe he would find your methods particularly pleasing.” A sparkle glittered in her eye as we circled each other, both panting. I felt a drop of sweat trickle down my back.

     “I’m--not--here--to--impress your old--fencing teacher,” I grunted as we engaged once more, letting my strength make up for my lack of...what did she say it was? Grace? “Grace will not accomplish anything.”

     “On the contrary, I think it does quite nicely.” Akira said as she slid from under my headlock and gave my calf a sound thwack.

     “You are just begging for a good thrashing!” I shouted. Then I lifted my blade high and roared like an angry bear. Kira shrieked and ran in circles around the clearing until I cornered her at the pond’s edge. She was caught. This would be easy. Grinning, I charged again--and recoiled as something flashed by me and tugged at the side of my hand. “Kira!”

     I was unable to slow down in time. Kira threw herself on the grass and caught my ankles. A wave of murky water washed up on the bank as I fell headfirst into the reeds and marsh marigolds.

     “KIRA!” Coughing, spluttering, I crawled out of the tangle of weeds and wiped as much of the mud from my hair as I could. She stood, leaning on her sword. Out of reach of the splash. Of course. I considered getting angry as I stood panting on the bank, water running down every part of me. Then I gave in. A grin broke through my shock. A laugh started to grow. It burst out of the deep part of my chest where it always does when I'm...more than happy, more than amused. I laughed until tears joined the pond water. For a moment, everything was golden--The afternoon sun, the water, Akira’s hair, and our pleasure. But the golden never lasts for long, and it faded until only the memory remained. Kira smiled at me as I walked up and joined me as I turned back towards the road, carrying my sword. “Let’s go back. Have anything for this?” I held up my hand, where Akira’s knife had nicked it. She handed me a kerchief. Then we were silent until we were a little ways into the city.

     “I definitely beat you.” Kira said.

      I, futilely, continued trying to rid my cloak of its excess moisture. “You pushed me into the pond! It hardly counts!”

      “I didn't push you. You tripped.”

      “Oh, yes? Over your hand?”

      “You said yourself there were no rules.”

      “Only because I didn't know you were carrying throwing knives! Remember last time, y--”

      “That occasion was entirely irrelevant. You try aiming at a moving target with a bull charging you.”

       I lifted my bandaged hand. “You nearly cut my finger off!”

       Kira rolled her eyes. “Don’t be a ninny.”

       I tossed my sopping cloak at her and gave an exasperated, but not displeased, groan. After all, it takes two very good friends to enjoy disagreeing.

I wrote that last night . I had so much fun I thought I'd share it here. Kira and Ben are comrades now as a result of their adventuring escapades, and that's all I'm going to say 'cause any more and I might spoil stuff. Also I don't feel like explaining their life stories right now.

I hope you enjoyed the blurb, though.

No title for this one--spoilers.

       I walked in the door sweaty, tired, sunburnt, with sand in my shoes. Usually you could guess what I had been doing--mowing the lawn perhaps, or helping Dad with one of his projects. But I forgot to mention the idiotically huge grin plastering itself over my face.  Mowing the lawn doesn't usually go hand-in-hand with that expression. There is only one thing on earth that could make me that happy. Yup. Horses.
       I know, I know,  its so darn cliche! About fifty-five percent of the world's female population will say that their favorite animal is the horse. I still fit in with the majority. Every little girl gets a bug in her brain about horses at some point in her life. most of them grow out of it. ...I never did.  Every person who has been around me long enough to have a conversation that goes somewhere along the line of "what do you like to do" knows this about me. So I proudly hold up my head and say that, yes, my favorite animal is the horse.

  Normally, this would be a perfect place for a rant about the beauty, grace, strength, and freedom of horses. But even if your brain is the size of a hummingbird's, you don't need me to tell you that. Suffice to say that no animal will ever, ever compare to a horse. That's why I came home that day with a gigantic grin on my face.